10 Craziest Dictators Of All-Time
Recently, War hero and cute old man/ Senator John McCain criticized President Donald
J. Trump for calling the media, ‘the enemy’. Even going as far as saying, “Dictators, get started by suppressing the free press.” And since Trump would put the Dick in Dictator — It got us thinking..who were the nuttiest of the nuts? With that being said, here’s our list of the ten most insane Dictators/ of all time!
The Uganda dictator had a short stint as ruler of the east african country. But throughout his 8 year reign, dude was as crazy as they come. Amin was a true ladies man in his own eyes,
writing love letters to Queen Elizabeth and having nine wives and an estimated 43 children. a true ladies man – Although he was once denied marriage by a daughter of an important Asian family, He then banned all asians from Uganda. His self professed titles were “conqueror of the british empire”, “President Fo lIfe” and my fave “Lord of all the beasts of the earth and fishes of the seas” that’s a way better nickname than “Sexual Chocolate” But the most craziest shit he was doing/ was killing off a bunch of his own peoples, an estimate of anywhere from 100,000 to 500,000 people. What an asshole!
Qaddafi might have the looniest fashion sense of all the dictators of past and present. Often
times wearing a traditional islamic dress with locs on. All of Gaddafi’s bodyguards were hot
Libyan chicks that were all apparently virgins. One of his female guards, who is now living in
hiding, claimed she witnessed the execution of 17 students and were ordered to cheer as the students were shot. Qaddafi was once known in Libya as “Prime minister – Brother leader and guide of the revolution”. Qaddafi’s crazy ass once claimed / he took over the US and that Barack Obama was his son. In 2011, he was killed by his own people with a knife shoved up his ass. Talk about a shitty way to go.
The late Iraq President had some serious issues. Some Iraqi officials even saying that he was mentally unstable when he led an invasion of tiny Vacation country Kuwait in 1990. That’s like the US invading the Bahamas just because… but his other weirdo ideas had others baffled. During a two year span, Saddam had 27 liters of blood removed regularly so that he could have a Qur’an written with it. 605 pages written of the holy book in all Saddam’s blood, I wonder who owns that? But his other excessive insane shit he did was having a vast collection of pistols, assault rifles, grenade launchers, and other crazy ass weapons all in Gold. Trinidad James would be so proud. And no, there were no gold Weapons of Mass Destruction found. Oh and that noise you just heard, was Dick Cheney screaming out “fuck!”
Trujillo who was dictator of the Dominican Republic had large thoughts of grandeur of himself and his family. Now we all know the pageant moms who thinks their kid is the best — but this dude was out of control with it. Even appointing his 3 year old son to Colonel then General of the Dominican army. Trujillo then campaigned hard for his wife to be awarded the Nobel Prize for literature, even though the bitch was illiterate. What the fuck? It gets better, the DR dictator then had all churches put up signs that read, “God in heaven, Trujillo on Earth.” This fucking idiot was then put out of his misery by a bunch of his own people and his spoiled family was then kicked out of the Dominican Republic for good.
Yahya was president of Gambia from 1994 until 2017. After losing the election in 2016, he
decided he did not recognize the results and proceeded to act like nothing ever changed / Until a military intervention by combined nations had to go down/ pretty much dude got evicted by some big ass bouncers. But while Yahya was President of Gambia, he claimed to have mystical powers, even discovering the cure to AIDS and HIV. Yahya had his people know him as “His excellency Sheikh Professor Alhaji Dr. Yahya Abdul-azziz emus junking jammed naassiru deen – ok we get it Yori, its fucking long… But the worst part of his reign, was the abduction of thousands of Gambians who were charged with Witchcraft. “You wear the same glasses as Harry Potter! —Witch!!”
5Mobutu Sese Seko
If Trump really wants to control the media, he should get PR training from the late President of Zaire, Mobutu. This looney toon, passed a law saying that Television in Zaire can only mention his name and no one else. I have No clue how the fuck that works… And all evening news had to begin with him descending from the heavens and clouds. Mobutu can easily say that he owns all Leopard print hats in Zaire at one point because dude banned all leopard print hats except his own. Why? Duuh.. How embarrassing would that be, if he showed up to the prom and his rival was wearing the same hat!
4Kim Jong Un
When his father Kim Jon Il passed, the world was wondering how his young, western educated son would rule the hermit country of North Korea. I think its safe to say, he’s a bigger cock sucker than anyone could have imagined. When pops died in 2011, every North Korean had to grieve wholeheartedly or be mortared. Ask deputy defense minister Kim Choi, who was locked up for insufficient grieving. The people of the DPRK are led to believe that Kim Jong and daddy Jong have never urinated nor pooped in their lives – because Gods don’t shit. More recently, world leaders were all pretty much in unison when they spoke of Kim Jong Un’s mental state to being erratic and uncontrollable/ after launching another nuclear test, he even had his brother and uncle killed, Told you this guy was a cock sucker.
Favorite random party question is always Who’s worse? Hitler or Stalin?? Lets dive in..Stalin’s reign of terror throughout his supreme ruling of the Soviet Union for 2 decades has caused death and suffering of an estimated tens of millions of people. Known as the man of steel, Stalin once executed all his guards, when they entered his room when he decided to ‘play scream’ as if he was in pain. Strict orders are given to never enter his private bedroom. Need that sign next time I’m in my Las Vegas hotel room. Hey Housekeeping!, Who the fuck wakes up at 9am in Vegas! Stalin was so paranoid that a political opponent would remove him from power, he would just have them imprisoned, tortured and killed. What a true dick- tator.
2Kim Jong Il
Now, his son could have taken the 2 spot. But Kim Jong Un must have learned his torturous
ways from Daddy. So The Team America star and I’m So Ronrey singer Kim Jong Il gets the
boost to the top. Daddy Il’s crazy reign of terror was led with his own thoughts of grandeur and narcissism. The first time he golfed, Mr Ronrey, had 11 holes in one and ended the day on a historic 38 under. Sports and art was apparently Kim’s thang: As Kim was such a fan of movies, he had a south korean director and his actress wife kidnapped to remake Godzilla. His people knew him as “The great man who descended from heaven” and the “invincible and ever triumphant general” Kim had his whole starving country in such fear. Defectors or enemies of the state were sent to hard labor camps or death. No wonder he was so fucking Ronrey.
To try to eviscerate and genocide an entire race and religion has to have you as the top cray cray dictator the world has ever seen. As the instigator of World War 2 and the creator of the Holocaust, Hitler was truly an evil and crazy motherfucker. What people don;t know was that Hitler had one nut sack and a micro penis, and was once in love with a jewish girl when he was a child. Also to note, Adolf who was known as the Fuhrer in Nazi Germany, apparently farted a lot. And loved to inject himself with bull semen to get his juices flowing for sex. Its estimated that 29 million soldiers and civilians were killed during adolf hitler’s reign. And to this day, he is still revered by some, as a savior and hero for his book Mein Kampf and racial ideologies.
And there you have it, our list of the 10 most insane dictators of all time. Did we miss any other crazy fuck Dictators? If so, mention them in the comment section below, and as always, don’t forget to like, share, and subscribe.